My quandary: pink or blue? UK or US Passport to take with me. Each carries its own risks. With the pink one, condescension towards a febrile, disorganised, arrogant, petulant little Island that got in over its waders and is now swimming in a sea of home-made muck. Talk about eat your own cooking. With the blue one, there is guilt by association with a barmy septuagenarian sporting an apricot rinse who personifies stupid (and constantly goes out of his way to expand the definition), cant keep his Twitter shut and can’t run a government (but he can run a huge tax loss carry forward). On this occasion, pink it is. It’ll be easier to cast an apologetic smile and shoulder shrug about British disfunctionality than squirm at American crassness. Trump makes OJ Simpson look innocent and Bush Junior a genius. Nothing personal.